Tough, But with a Kind Heart
A conversation about managing transitions with intention, grace, and compassion
On Thursday March 6, 2025 Gateway Mountain Center’s interim executive director, Kelly Bathgate, and board member Bella Berns, came together to reflect on their individual journeys that led them to Gateway, their vision for and role in helping the organization sharpen its strategic and operational focus, and why they believe centering connection, authenticity, and laughter is key to building a healthy, thriving, and resilient organization. (The following is an excerpt from their conversation, which was facilitated by Gateway Mountain Center Director of Philanthropy Kate Frankfurt, and Jabeen Yusuf, co-founder/principal of Health+ Studio).
Bella: I want to start by saying I’m so excited to have this conversation with you, Kelly! All of our conversations have been one part realism, one part humor, and 64 parts strategy. I appreciate the rapid-fire exchange that can be both pragmatic and real in the same breath, acknowledging the realities of the ‘today was really, really tough’ component of your leadership during this transition. It’s a privilege to work with and learn from someone with your experience, perspective, and empathy while creating lasting change for Gateway’s youth.
Kelly: Now I’ll have to share my side. So, I got introduced to you by our board chair. And I didn't actually have a lot of context other than you were interested in Gateway and wanted to talk to me. And I was like, great! Then there was this immediate connection when we talked.
You were asking all these hard and good and interesting questions that made me think about things differently, combined with this level of confidence and curiosity that you exuded. And now you’re on our board! I believe that having a strong and highly engaged board leads to a level of support and trust . . . especially when an organization is going through the kind of strategic transition that Gateway is going through right now.
Bella: So, I had been looking at Gateway’s programs from a mental health impact perspective for a few years with admiration and curiosity. Peter Mayfield, Gateway’s founder, has built incredible mental health programs, meeting a vital need in Tahoe and beyond. We’re so excited to take that forward to accommodate the growing requests for nature-based interventions.
These programs are innovative, accessible, and scalable. Yet, applying a lens from finance, nonprofits, and foundations, I knew there were some gaps and hurdles that needed to be addressed to solidify Gateway’s operations to unlock the potential for transformative impact with our youth in Tahoe, the Bay Area, and ideally further afield!
Having those recent conversations with you, the board, and the program leadership really clarified for me how active the organization has been in embarking on real change and most importantly, where it wanted to (and could) go. The team’s vision, exceptionally hard work, and enthusiasm made it obvious to say, ‘I want to get involved now!’
“As one of Gateway's new board members, I have been so impressed not only by the diversity and quality of our leadership, but by everyone’s enthusiasm and action in Gateway’s transition.”
–Gateway Mountain Center Board Member Bella Berns
Approaching Change and Transformation with Intent
Kelly: I want to pick up on this idea of intention that you’ve brought up. Without approaching the work with that level of clear intentionality and focus on what the organization wants to achieve and matching it to the initial exciting vision and passion, it’s a bit like the squirrel analogy . . . where an organization starts going after anything that feels exciting and starting up new programs or strategies that may not align or advance the mission and the impact the organization is trying to achieve.
For Gateway, we have to think about intentionality in two ways. First, how well we’re delivering our programs most effectively so we are serving the youth and their families now, but also lifting up to creating systemic change and rethinking how mental health can be delivered to young people. This is where I feel like my past experience of supporting organizations that are going through transitions has been really helpful for my current role with Gateway.
I think that I have developed a skill to be able to see and feel that the passion and magic that a visionary or a founder brings to that initial idea, and then am able to step back and assess that structural business stuff . . . all the nerdy, day-to-day things that are not as exciting on the face, but are the enablers that are essential to move from that initial phase of passion and excitement to a level of operational excellence and discipline essential for fueling growth and sustainability. I guess I’m just attracted to that kind of messy space.
Bella: Kelly, you just used one of my favorite words — messy — highlighting the notion of beautiful imperfection. I’m drawn to start up or transition projects that aren’t straightforward. Within this phase, there's a level of sadness and beauty as well as chaos and persistence needed. So, as leaders managing that change, we have to balance and hold it. Ideally working between actively pushing or guiding the idea, or simply listening as a sounding board.
I do believe that there are boards and teams that can be built to manage this messy phase with grace, focus, and humility. As one of the new Gateway board members, I have been so impressed not only by the diversity and quality of our leadership, but by the excitement and enthusiasm everyone has about this particular moment for Gateway. It's rare that I step onto a transition board with so many uniquely qualified and passionate individuals who are committed to bringing their talents to the organization and want to be actively engaged in this journey.
Kelly: Yes. In many ways, Gateway is “growing up.” Again, these are not the exciting rah-rah type of things, but they’re the backbone for building a strong organization. It’s everything from ensuring really clear communication between the executive leadership and the board and to the staff, to the organizational infrastructure pieces — sound financial management, strong fundraising and continued program safeguarding and impact . . . that all has to keep up with the growing vision to make it work. It’s a bit jargony, but this idea of professionalizing the board and bringing in people who bring in certain expertise and skill sets to the organization and ensuring that we are upleveling across the organization.
“For Gateway, we have to think about intentionality in two ways. First, how we’re delivering our programs most effectively so we are serving the youth and their families, but also how our work scales up to creating systemic change and rethinking how mental health can be delivered to young people.”
– Gateway Mountain Center Interim Executive Director Kelly Bathgate
Partnering With Funders
Bella: I want to add that this idea of being not only comfortable, but excited by growth chaos applies to funders as well. I’ve been in conversation with friends and colleagues who are well-versed in funding and implementing mental health initiatives … This moment in Gateway’s journey is attractive to someone who is looking to build upon a proven mental health model with realistic awareness that an organization needs to solidify their foundation while also expanding.
Gateway is fortunate to have built a really unique revenue model. It comprises a mix of government grants, individual foundation and corporate funds along with earned income (through our Sierra Experience kids’ camps and school programs) — unique for a nonprofit! Funders can confidently partner with the organization knowing that programs are meeting an acute mental health need and gap in access while also supporting much needed organizational growth. Funding partners who thrive on making an impact in this important liminal space for Gateway are instrumental to the future success of programs.
Kelly: I would add that a funder who understands that organizational transitions are hard. I feel like there's a level of commitment and tenacity that is needed from everyone involved, including the funding partners when a transition is happening.
Getting back to that idea of a commitment to wade through the imperfections . . . I agree with you that for a certain kind of funder, that can be super exciting. They have the opportunity to be on the frontlines of the process of bringing a level of rigor and strategic clarity. Most importantly, they get to be a part of building something lasting. It’s about being a part of the transformation and not just a transaction. Gateway is a disruptor in the mental health system. And the type of funder who I imagine might want to support Gateway right now is somebody who finds that exciting.
Reflections on the Leadership Journey
Bella: Kelly, I want to end our conversation by asking you a question about leadership. We’ve talked a lot about transitions, and where Gateway is in its journey. It’s the people who lead organizations through transitions. So in that spirit, what are the leadership qualities you bring to the organization as our interim executive director? What is your version of “Believe” from Ted Lasso?
Kelly: I mean, this is kind of cheating because I’m one of those weirdos that actually puts things like that on post-it notes! Like if we're in a conversation and someone says something that I really like, I'll write it down on a post-it note and put it up on my monitor to remind myself of it daily.
I was having a hard conversation about the transition with a team member, and they looked at me and said, ‘you’re tough, but in a good way. Like tough but with a kind heart.’ So I wrote that down because that's certainly something I do actually aspire to in this work - “tough, with a kind heart.” And then as I think about it more, 'cause again, it's on my monitor, so I look at it and think about it sometimes . . . it’s such a helpful reminder when in the hard conversations and in the messiness of it. It’s absolutely what is needed right now. For us to hold each other with a level of discipline combined with empathy.
I also think it's probably what's needed for a lot of the youth we’re supporting who are going through challenging times in their own lives. So, tough, with a kind heart. Now, I’ll turn that question right back at you, Bella. What is on your Ted Lasso poster board?
Bella: This is cheating given Ted Lasso is an absolute favorite series in our family. I think we've watched it together three times, which is a miracle in itself as I have teenagers who aren’t looking for more ‘mom time!’
I think, from my vantage point, the word would be connection. For the youth to be connecting with themselves, their mentors, and the nature-based healing spaces they need. Internally, for the team to be connecting and lifting each other. Finally, creating a strong, connected community of clinicians, funders, school partners, youth groups — all of us working together to anchor connections for each other and most importantly for our young people.
That is the only way we can create impact, make a difference, and fulfill our mission of helping youth learn, heal, and thrive.
Kelly: Well said. I think that’s a great place to end. Thank you for being my partner in this conversation.